The state of Arkansas has approved us to be parents...lucky for Gage I guess! Tyler and I drove to Conway and met Friday afternoon and Saturday morning with Grace Adoptions. They are so wonderful and the whole home study process has been a very positive experience. Amid all the beneficial conversations, they also delivered some news we have been anticipating (but not looking forward to). Since the announcement from Ethiopia last month of the slow down in the adoption process, they told us to be prepared for our original 1 year wait to potentially be 3 years. I am so thankful Tyler was able to jump in and keep the conversation going because I am pretty sure I just froze, mouth wide open and eyes glazed over. Wow...I knew something like this was coming, but to hear someone actually say 3 YEARS was tough. I am determined to not let this news consume me though, once again I have to remind myself that it's not about my timeline. I know God is in control of this situation and I just have to give it to Him. No matter what the timing turns out to be, it's still wonderful to be one.step.closer.
I asked Tyler this question a few weeks ago, "Huh?" he said. "Do you think the birth mother is taking any prenatal vitamins?" "Seriously? No, I'm going to guess she's not." he replied and threw in an eye roll. I already knew the answer to the question, and in reality we don't even know if our child has been conceived yet. I don't know why this thought keeps coming up, I guess it is part of not having any control over this process. When I was pregnant with Gage, we paid $30 per month (after insurance) for prescription prenatal vitamins that apparently had super natural powers. $1 per day for vitamins...that's more than what the average Ethiopian lives on. Now, I also gave birth to our child, the most wonderfully perfect baby you could ever imagine (see exhibit A). Was it the vitamins? We'll never know. This new pregnancy will be void of magical, horse pill-sized vitamins and all other prenatal care and will produce the same outcome, our child, who will be the most wonderfully perfect baby you could ever imagine.
Over the last few months as we have been sharing our news, we have gotten a wide range of reactions. Announcing an adoption does not receive the same response as announcing a pregnancy...it just doesn't. I knew to expect that and we have been fortunate to not have any flat out negative things said to us directly. Though even through the "excited" and "surprised" reactions, I feel like some have been dying to say "...but why?" It's a valid question and obviously one we've asked ourselves too. Three years ago when we first decided to start a family, we literally spoke the words and within a month I was pregnant. I sailed through the pregnancy with no morning sickness or complications (unless you consider gaining 40 lbs of water weight just in your head a complication, if so, then that was the only one :). We are blessed to have outstanding health benefits through Tyler's work and literally paid less for the whole pregnancy, labor, delivery and follow-up than we did for a previous summer vacation. For all the many things that can go wrong with a pregnancy, we had it easy. This is what has people questioning, why wouldn't you even try and have another biological child? Good question. One that doesn't just have a straightforward answer. When we first started talking about a sibling for Gage, adoption casually came up between us. I started researching it and praying. Tyler was convinced before I was, but never pushed it. The more I read and prayed, it just seemed so clear. Why not adopt? Why can't adoption be Plan A for growing your family? The world has millions of orphans waiting for a forever family. As a child of God, we have all been adopted, but I can't even imagine life without an earthly mommy or daddy. We fully believe this is part of God's plan for our family and we, for maybe the first time ever, are obediently taking this leap of faith to follow Him. So will it cost more than the pregnancy? Of course, we're talking way more and we haven't figured out how we are going to pay for it, that's part of the stepping out in faith. Will it take longer? You bet, the only thing certain about adoption is its uncertainty. Will it be harder? Probably, the seemingly endless paper work, months of waiting, not to mention after meeting your child you have to leave them for possibly months until you are cleared to return and bring them home, all things that I see could be MORE painful than natural child birth! So again you ask, WHY? To which I still reply, why not? :)
"I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you" John 14:18 Our first family blog...this is exciting! I have never really considered starting a blog, I always felt our daily lives, while wonderful, were not "blog worthy". I don't even know what that means, but that's what I have been telling myself. Here we are though, with "blog worthy" news, we are adopting! The accounts of this journey will probably be more for our sake than for that of others. Someday we will look back at all the many months of this process and remind ourselves it was all worth it. Check back often if you would like to stay up to date on where we are at, I'll attempt to post regularly and keep the time line updated. Please say a prayer for us as we work to complete our dossier and pray for our baby...who only God knows right now.
|
AuthorJami Archives
November 2016
|